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Thursday
Mar172016

Get More Passion!

Passion, I believe can ebb and flow. Life does step in and bring that numbness into a relationship, where everything start to feel it’s on auto pilot. However, with a little effort that passion can be brought back into a relationship.

There are two reasons a relationship hits that happiness plateau.

 The first is that the relationship hits a rut and that’s really common, problems do surface but if you leave it unattended and let it persist then that starts to became a hazard to the health of the relationship.

The second reason is that that the relationship cools on passion and sex.  Both passion and sexuality are important. Why? Men tend to get emotional connection (a component of passionate love) though sex; while women tend to need  emotional connection (passion) to HAVE sex. Therefore we need to reinvigorate both the passion and the sex for both partners to feel fulfilled.

So how do we go about keeping the passion in our long-term relationships?

 

1) Slow down. 

We are all rushing about with our 101 obligations and self important agenda that we don’t stop nearly enough to put our love, passion and desire back at the top of the priority list. Your relationship is vital to feeling GREAT with life. Give it time, attention and priority.

Switch off the phone, stop checking emails and pay attention to each other. 

 

2) PLAY!

My favorite word! We need to play together more often.

Make a play date and do something fun together to reconnect. 

Forget the rest of the world and it’s multitude of responsibilities and have some private “us” time. A friend of mine takes a Friday afternoon off work every now and then (as does his wife), that gives them a few precious hours (between the sheets) playing before the kids came home from school. 

 

3) Do new stuff together.

Remember when you both first got together, there was a whole new world in the other person to get to know. So many new adventures and delights to behold and explore. Renew that now and then.

Do something completely “out-of-the-box” together.

Do something you haven’t done in ages together. Try that new chocolate restaurant and no checking the news on your smart phone while you are there! It’s amazing what getting out of your normal routine and pushing your comfort boundaries will do for your love life.

 

4) Touch

Over time, too many couples only engage in touch when one or the other wants sex. Touch - non sexual touching creates connectivity. Things can get awfully disjointed when this touch only happens ten minutes before intercourse!

Touch creates closeness. Closeness is more than sex. Intimacy is the glue that holds relationships together. Kissing, hugging, gentle touches as you pass one another, holding hands, small caresses - it’s like a secret ‘handshake’ that keeps the “us” special.

Touch is the way to make love all day outside of the bedroom.   

 

The key to keeping that passion is to introduce some freshness into your partnership to liven things up...reintroduce some fun, laughter, energy, excitement and surprise.

 

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